When we are not one with the Father we become restless, disturbed, and often upset because of the way things are going in our life.  When we are unified with Him, we will only do the things that He is doing, rather than becoming fearful and worried about our performance.  When we are not one with the Father, our innermost being is not at peace and we ask Him questions out of our doubt and fear.  Unity with the Father and Son will instantly solve these situations and predicaments in our life.

People who have a tendency to be performance-oriented are often not at peace in their spirit.  They too often step out of God’s canopy of protection into a place, errantly created out of a need to fulfill God’s work in their own strength.

I am often amazed at my pastor’s wife.  She carries an unbelievable load and I am sure I do not know the half of it.  People tug at her from all directions and yet she stays in a protected area of peace and is somehow able to let God handle the weight of her burdens.  This always amazes and inspires me;  I want that same anointing as she has.

I have been working frantically on getting my book Brushed by God printed and on the market.  After all, I am 72 years old, and I sure do not have a lifetime ahead of me.  Last week, during a discussion on the setbacks and struggles I have had, a dear friend from Ireland looked at me over the breakfast table and asked, “Have you ever thought about fasting?”  I was rather surprised at his question and quickly answered with a smug expression, “Well, I fast all the time.”  (La-di-dah!) “No,” he responded, “I mean fasting from what you are doing.”  Oh.  Well.  That was a completely different matter, believe me!

His words hit me like a ton of bricks and thoughts raced through my mind:  “Who else will do this work?  How am I going to get this done by not making it happen?  I know God is in this whole book thing, but I have to do something, since it will not fall into my lap by itself.”  It took me a whole week to work through all the questions and fears I had.

Then I came to a point of relinquishing the book.  I handed the production of it over to Him.  I came to the conclusion that even if the book was never going to be printed within my budget it would be just fine.  It is His book and if He wants it out there it will happen because of Him, and not because I made it happen with some of His help.  No, it had to be exclusively His work through me.  I had to step out of the way, so I could let Him be God.

After I decided deep in my inner heart to let go of the project, His peace and rest flooded my being.  Now I can walk away from it at any time and be tranquil, at peace.  I can take His hand and let Him lead me until my task on earth is accomplished.  However, because my tendency is to pick things up again, even after I have yielded them to the Father, I constantly have to watch my motives and ambitions.

My dad had the same tendency.  Under pressure, he would make things happen without God’s consultation or approval.  Consequently, he made a lot of mistakes in life and was a very unhappy person.  I do realize my tendencies are like his and I certainly do not want to pass this on the my children or grandchildren.

(Part 2 published on Friday, February 11, 2011.)